“Stop the habit of wishful thinking and start the habit of thoughtful wishes.” Mary Martin
What are your most constant wishes? Have any of your wishes come true? How did that happen?
(Many thanks to Larry today for our topic. As usual, you all offered many good ideas, and I thank you. Next week, I will need a word starting with “X” and that will be a challenge finding a topic that I can actually write about, so I look forward to your ideas. Please leave them in Comment)
What do you wish for today? No doubt we all have one common wish: end the pandemic. While it has not stopped all our wishes from coming to fruition, it certainly has restricted many of them relating to travel, jobs, and socialization.
The large increase in patients reminds us that the wishful thinking that the virus won’t hit us so we don’t need to get the vaccine is not thoughtful wishing. Even when we wish, we need to be aware of reality and consequences, especially if there could be danger involved.
Our wishes often determine how we see things. When we are lonely for friends or a relationship, we may meet a person with whom we have much in common and to whom we are drawn. With time, we may find that our wishes and reality do match and this friendship will become long-term and positive for us, but we may also find that it is not what we hoped it would be.
We May Only See The Surface
When a relationship begins well and matches our wishes, it may be difficult to see beyond those wishes. What we have seen may only be the surface. As the differences and difficulties arise, we need to face the situation thoughtfully. Can these problems be fixed? Is this relationship likely to develop in a more positive way?
In these situations, we especially need to explore our “thoughtful wishes.” We need to think as well as feel. Are our wishes leading us to take more time to understand the other person’s desires and needs? Is the other person showing us respect and honoring our needs? As long as the answers to these questions are “yes” we are letting our wishes lead us in a wise direction.
If we discover that our needs are not being met, then we need to rethink what we are doing. We may be disappointed that the friendship is not what we had hoped, but we need to realistically evaluate to see if it is time for us to move on.
Thoughtful Wishes May Manifest
At times, our wishes may be able to help us make our dreams come true. When I was young, my greatest wish was to become a dancer. I could see it wouldn’t be easy since my early illness had kept me from the usual activity of childhood. But when my high school offered modern dance, I jumped at the chance to become strong and expressive. Over time I had to let go of wishful thinking and embrace thoughtful wishing that led to action.
By doing that, I was able to make the choices that allowed me to follow my “bliss” and take care of my health at the same time. My wishful thinking led me to thoughtful wishing and that led me into a life I loved, a life that no one early in my life would have thought I could achieve.
Wishes May Come True
We’ve all heard the expression, “Be careful what you wish for.” I always thought of it as a warning that made wishing rather dangerous. If you wished for the wrong thing, it could be a disaster. Now when I hear the phrase, I think it is saying, “Think about what you wish for and be sure it is what you want, because you are likely to get it.”
When we have had our wishes come true, becoming a doctor, an artist, a minister, or a parent, we are able to look at life more positively. We know that our wishes can come true, but we also know that requires thought and work.
May you all experience thoughtful wishes today.
© 2021 Georganne Spruce
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