Tag Archives: Self-awareness

AWAKENING TO OUR DREAMS

Posted on January 30, 2013 | 1 comment

“There are those who look at things the way they are, and ask why…I dream of things that never were, and ask why not?”  Robert Kennedy

Ciudad de Malaga al atardecer con los Montes d...

Ciudad de Malaga al atardecer con los Montes de Africa (Photo credit: carloscASTROweb)

Have many of your dreams come true?  Is there a connection between the dreams you dream at night and the desires you have when you wake?  How can you use those dreams to become more conscious?

Dreams Help Us Envision New Possibilities

Wouldn’t it be great if life progressed in a straight line so that we could always see where we’re going?  Then we’d know ahead what dreams would come true and which wouldn’t, and we wouldn’t waste our time struggling to make things happen that never happen.  But then of course, we wouldn’t experience the joy of rich surprises and miracles that open possibilities we never envisioned.

One day after a job interview, I stood beside the fireplace in a restaurant, watching the snow fall lightly outside.  I turned and he was there, stepping forward to offer me a seat. The dream had suddenly changed shape, wearing wire-rimmed glasses and a mischievous smile, and we both knew life would never be the same.  Although the relationship was not the dream that lasted for a lifetime, it was one that taught me I could be respected for my intelligence and could share a deeply spiritual relationship.

Manifesting A Dream May Be A Mysterious Path

Life is a spiral dance, weaving steps we know and steps we don’t know—a journey that takes us through shadows and sunlight.  There are the dreams we dream and the dreams we don’t dream—the ones we bury along the way because our parents tell us they can’t come true.  Then one day, we are standing on a stage as the lights come up and our hands begin to strum a guitar or the words of Shakespeare pour from our lips, and we cannot even remember where this moment began.  But somewhere, sometime, it was a dream, an image in our souls that was caught on the wind and carried forward through time, materializing despite all obstacles.

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As a child, I wanted to be a doctor and help Albert Schweitzer heal the lepers in Africa, but after struggling with high school chemistry, I gave up the dream of being a doctor and going to Africa.   Forty years later, in the early morning of a July day, I stepped off an airplane onto African soil.  In that moment, my life changed.  I became a citizen of the world.  I could never have dreamed of the path that led me there.

Each Dream, Even The Dark One, Is A Gift From Spirit

Each dream is a gift from Spirit, whether it is a conscious dream or an unconscious one.  It leads us to places we never dreamed of going or never thought we could reach.  Other dreams may serve a different purpose and may create the illusions where we hide from what we cannot bear to see.  Other times dreams are demonic and rip the illusions away, spiraling us into the darkness of our own depth to find the real answers.

For years, I read New Mexico Magazine, feeling drawn by some powerful force to go there.  When I was almost healed from chronic fatigue, it became clear that I needed to live in a dry environment in order to complete the healing.  A friend invited me to house sit with her that summer in Albuquerque.  Once I was there, I could not leave.  The Native-American culture and art fed my soul.  Then, I found the perfect teaching job right away although it was almost time for school to start.  It all seemed like a dream come true.

But this was the land of enchantment, and what appeared to be magical, within five years, fell apart.  I lost my job, my friends, my spiritual community, my security and all my illusions.  Stripped to the core by following a dream based on illusion, who I really was continued to emerge.  I began to write and discovered a strength and spiritual balance I had never known.

Dreams May Be Profound Spiritual Guides

Those dreams that come in the night, wrapped round with symbols and mystery, may very well hold the answers to the problems in our lives and lead us to the light.  Carl Jung, the famous psychoanalyst, said in his book Man and His Symbols, “The general function of dreams is to restore our psychological balance by producing dream material that re-established, in a subtle way, the total psychic equilibrium.”

Deutsch: Carl Gustav Jung

Deutsch: Carl Gustav Jung (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

After my divorce in 1976, I felt unhinged without a job or money.  The grief and anger I felt overwhelmed me.  Then one night, I dreamed I was standing in a plaza with a pool in the center.  A green ladder rose upward and across the pool and into the upper floor of a several story building on the far side.  At the base of the ladder I stood with a young man and a blond-haired woman in a red dress, a version of me that had appeared in other dreams. We performed a ritual, breaking the bread the woman had baked.  Then the man left, and the woman began to climb the ladder, beckoning to me.  Despite my fear, I followed her.

When I awoke, I realized the dream was telling me exactly what I needed to do.  My choice to climb the green ladder was a sacred act. I needed to follow a spiritual path that would lead me to a higher consciousness.  Because the arch led over water, which symbolized emotion, it was also telling me to move beyond just reacting emotionally.  The dream told me how to heal.

There are the dreams we choose to dream and the ones that come to us unexpectedly.  Weaving through our lives with joy and mystery, they are one of Spirit’s greatest transformative gifts.  May you dream well tonight.

What dreams have provided you with important insights? Please comment.

For a more in depth understanding of the value of understanding dreams and how they provide guidance in your life, read my book Awakening to the Dance: A Journey to Wholeness.

©2013 Georganne Spruce                                            ZQT4PQ5ZN7F5

Related Articles: Nightmares, Dreams, and the Ego: a New Earth Video, Spiritual Dream Interpretation: Understanding Your Dreams, Jung Dream Interpretation

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AWAKENING TO SEE THE BEAUTY OF LIFE

Posted on September 5, 2012 | 1 comment

 

 

NEED TO “RELEASE YOUR FEAR” AND MOVE ON WITH YOUR LIFE?  ATTEND MY WORKSHOP ON SEPTEMBER 9 IN ASHEVILLE, NORTH CAROLINA.  CLICK HERE FOR MORE INFORMATION.

 

AWAKENING TO SEE THE BEAUTY OF LIFE

“We can only be said to be alive in those moments when our hearts are conscious of our treasures.”  Thornton Wilder

Do you often feel overwhelmed by what you need to do?  Do you run your life or does your life run you?  Are you giving attention to those people or activities you most value?

Nature Enriches Our Spirits

I try to schedule a hike once a week during the summer because I feel such a strong need to be out in nature.  It calms and connects me with Spirit in a deep way.  It’s also a great way to connect with people who also love nature, and since my main hiking buddy was away most of the summer, I enjoyed meeting more hikers.

It’s taken a while to find the right group.  When I first moved to the mountains, the first group I hiked with used hiking as an aerobic activity and went so fast it was impossible to enjoy the scenery and plant life.  Another group only went on lengthy, challenging hikes.  Finally I found a group that fit my needs, but these hikers also move too fast for me at times.

When I hike, I want to be able to see what is along the trail:  the flowers, mushrooms, moss, knarled branches, bright leaves, and small crawling creatures (as long as they don’t rattle).  I want to be engaged with what is around me:  feel the moisture, smell the scents, examine the textures.  The stimulation of hiking through such an extremely bio-diverse area can be intoxicating.  I love getting drunk on its beauty.

Missing Pleasure Through Haste

Soren Kierkegaard said, “Most people pursue pleasure with such breathless haste they hurry right past it.”  Have you ever been walking briskly past an art gallery or clothing store, saw a flash of something colorful, but you were half a block away before you could stop yourself to go back and see what it was that you only partly saw?  Think about how much time we could save if we would slow down and see what was before us without having to backtrack.

In our society, it isn’t just the speed with which we pursue pleasure that limits the pleasure in our lives; it’s the speed with which we do everything.  In many instances, we have committed to more than we can handle well.  We want to please everyone, help everyone, experience everything, and on top of that, time is literally speeding up.  We are now experiencing in one year what we used to experience in five years.  We think the solution to this problem is to hurry more.  It isn’t.

The Pleasure of Being in the Moment

How would we feel if we each took fifteen minutes a day to immerse ourselves in something we found truly pleasurable?  What if we took the time to really touch our partners fully aware of that touch?  What if we focused on the pleasurable taste, color and texture of each bite we eat?   What if, instead of rushing through the book we’re reading, we let ourselves merge with the delicious cadence and imagery of the words?

Rushing all the time doesn’t feel like living to me, and I’m not alone because several friends have made the same comment lately—they just need more time to be and less time to do.  It’s pretty clear that Spirit is trying to teach me how to do this because invariably when I start whizzing around the house at a high speed, I always trip over a chair, stab my thigh on the corner of a table, or spill a pitcher of water.  If I don’t have sense enough to slow down, life will do it for me.

Finding Spiritual Treasures in Our Hearts

To become more conscious, we need to notice when we feel stressed, angry, overwhelmed, or exhausted.  We need to simply stop, take a breath, go to our heart centers and feel who we are.  We need to look around us for the beauty we may have missed.  What’s more important, seeing your child’s smile or cleaning the house?  When we move too fast all the time, we become insensitive.  Anything that gets in the way of our getting the “work” done gets pushed aside, and if that includes people we love, that’s a tragedy.

As Thornton Wilder reminds us, we aren’t really alive unless, at the heart level, we are conscious of our “treasures.”  We have to pay attention and strip away the distractions.  It means we have to leave the party or race track, stop using the alcohol and drugs to give us the high our pleasure-loving selves pursue, and get in touch with what is deep and worthwhile where the deepest pleasures of love, peace and joy reside.  It means we have to give up our obsession with achievement, our need to always be right, and our desire to please everyone.  We have to take time to find our centers, linger in the heart to see what our real treasure is, and prioritize our lives so we have the time to see what really matters.

© 2012 Georganne Spruce                                                                   ZQT4PQ5ZN7F5

Related Articles:  Wake Up, and You Can Help the World Awaken, Awakening the Mysterious Feminine Goddess, How can I Be In the Present Moment – Eckhart Tolle  (video)

 

 

 

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AWAKENING TO YOUR TRUE IDENTITY

Posted on April 11, 2012 | 1 comment

“It’s not who you are that holds you back, it’s who you think you are not.”  Denis Waitley

How would you describe yourself in one sentence?  Do you define who you are from your deepest core or do you define who you are based on what others think of you?

We are all spiritual beings and that means that we are part of the creative energy, the core DNA of the universe.  Because of this, we are all, at our centers, good, but we are also in this life to learn lessons, and those challenges may lead us to focus on our weaknesses.  Many times we forget who we really are and create stories about ourselves that are judgmental and negative.

Avoid Accepting Another’s Negative Vision of You

The negative stories that can create serious blocks in our development are the ones that come from childhood.  When I was four years old, I had rheumatic fever and developed a heart murmur that I eventually outgrew by age twelve.  During that time, I had many childhood illnesses.  As a result, much of my childhood was spent in bed, not being active.

When I was fifteen, I had a modern dance class at school and saw that, through dance, I could develop the strength I lacked.  I pursued this interest in dance at college, studied professionally, danced in a company and taught.  By the time I was an adult, I was very strong and energetic, but my mother continued to see me as weak.  Throughout my young life, she worried that I would make myself sick and warned me that what I was doing could hurt me.  For years, she was unable to let go of this image of me, and even after I rejected it, it lurked in the dark corners of my mind ready to undermine me.

Don’t Let Limitations Define You

I developed the idea that being tired was the equivalent of getting sick. What held me back in many endeavors was that I didn’t think I was strong enough to put forth the effort required to be successful. Even as an adult, I sometimes stopped short of achieving my goal because I was afraid I wouldn’t succeed.  It took me a long time to push past this and realize it was my mother’s vision of me, created out of her fear, not who I was.

I’ve always been inspired by Laura Hillenbrand who wrote the best-seller Seabiscuit while she had Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. Not only do I love her book; I admire her courage and strength.  She did not let her limitations define her.

Do you let your limitations, the things you are not, define who you are? Do you think, “I’m a decent, competent person who is out of a job,” or “I’m a loser because I’m out of a job.”? Limitations are only one aspect of life.  Don’t let them define you.  When you define yourself in a positive way, it raises your vibrational energy.  Not only does that make you feel better, it draws more positive people and experiences to you and may decrease the restrictions in your life.

Practice Positive Spiritual Principles

I’m not suggesting that you ignore the things in your life that aren’t working well, but affirming what you want and taking some steps toward making them a reality will move you forward more quickly than focusing on the negative aspect of the situation.  Of course, ideally, we look honestly at the situation, release our ego-attachment to the outcome, and do what we can to correct it.  Affirming with genuinely positive emotion that somehow we will find a solution to the problem adds more positive energy to the mix. However, what we think we need isn’t always what we do need, and the universe is kind enough to correct our delusion.  My spiritual teacher used to say that we will get what we need, but it may not look like what we expected or come at the time we expect.

Manifestation may also be blocked by a contradictory statement.  “I affirm that my illness will be healed in three months, but I accept this may not happen.”  The last part of the statement cancels out the first, so the energy that is created by the positive statement is neutralized by the negative.  Be aware that all statements that begin with but contain fear and fears block manifestation.  It is worthwhile to look beneath your negative statement and ask, “Why do I believe I can’t manifest this?”  If you truly believed you could manifest your desire, you would not need the qualifier.

Believe in Yourself

Believe that you are part of this magnificently creative universe.  Believe that what you manifest is a step forward and that you have succeeded even if it doesn’t exactly meet your expectations.  Believe that as you practice spiritual principles, that you will change your life for the better.  If you are not the person you want to be, know that you are in charge of who you are and commit to accepting what is best about you, knowing that is who you truly are and take action to change what you don’t like, knowing that the universe supports all that is good in you.

What negative ideas about yourself have you discarded lately?

© 2012 Georganne Spruce

Related Articles:  5 Ways to find Your True Identity, Becoming the Person You Were Meant to Be:  Where to Start by Anne Lamott, Total Recall of Who We Are: Stop Thinking and Start Being 

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AWAKENING TO THE DANCE OF TRUST

Posted on March 21, 2012 | Leave a comment

“…you can choose to become aware—to become truly conscious—and to see yourself as both the perpetrator and the target of your creation.  You are not a victim of your addictions, or your cravings, or your unbridled desires.  You are a fully responsible participant in your reaction to the choices presented.”  Oneness by Rasha, p. (319)

Do you trust yourself to make wise decisions? Do you trust those around you? What is it that allows you to be trustworthy or untrustworthy?

The Role of Trust in Our Lives

What is the real nature of trust?  Sometimes in my life I have trusted others too much, ignoring the obvious signs that this wasn’t wise; sometimes I’ve trusted too little.  Basically, I’ve lived my life based on the philosophy that I will trust other people until they prove to be untrustworthy.  That’s a very altruistic path and has often served me well, but not always.

When we expect the best from others, they often live up to our expectations.  When we expect the worse, they often meet those expectations too.  Our energy influences others more than we realize.  So what causes some people to go through life feeling paranoid and sure they may be the victim of another scam, while others expect life to treat them well most of the time?

Trusting Others is Based on Trusting Ourselves

I believe how much we trust life and others is based on how much we trust ourselves.  Do you think you make good choices most of the time?  If you do, I suspect that you have developed a way of making choices that is based on your connection to your spiritual core.  You have probably developed a decision-making process that produces positive results most of the time.

I’ve refined my process over the years, learning different strategies from experience and study.  I know that if I feel fearful, I need to clear my mind by releasing the fear so I can see what the issue really is.  Then I listen.  What is my intuition telling me?  I ask Spirit for guidance.  I look at my own value system.  Is this situation asking me to violate what I consider ethical?

Awakening to Higher Choices

Oneness says, “There are no definitive laws of right and wrong, beyond those you create and set for yourself.  There are higher choices or lesser choices, in terms of the predictable consequence of certain actions.” (Page 318) When I taught high school in New Mexico, I taught a drama class, and among my students was a young man who was a senior and failing.  His attendance had been poor, and he had completed only about half the required assignments.  His parents asked for a conference with me and the principal.  After I explained why he was failing, the principal said, “Now Ms. Spruce, what extra work can you give this young man so that he can pass?”

The parents of this student were members of the founding family of this small town, and I knew the principal felt pressured by this.  On the other hand, school had already ended for all the seniors.  Was it fair for me to create a means for this student to pass when I couldn’t make it available to other failing seniors?  Should I save a student who had repeatedly ignored opportunities to make up missing work and who had chosen, for no legitimate reason, not to attend many classes?  After thinking for a moment, I said, “No, there is nothing I can do.  He’s made his choice and he has to live with it.”  The principal’s face turned bright red.  He was furious.

I knew that, by saying “no,” I would not be invited back the next year.  Since it was my first year in that school district, I was on probation as are all teachers during their first year.  As a result, if a negative evaluation were sent to the state, I could lose my teaching license.  To cut my loses, I resigned, and fortunately found a position in another district.

Choosing the Spiritual Path

I have never, for a moment, regretted that decision.  I knew then and know now that I chose the higher path.  I could not offer this student a second chance unless I offered it to all my failing students.  Did I feel like a victim?  No, what I did was my choice.  Was I angry and upset about the situation? Of course, I thought it was outrageous.  But that’s life, isn’t it.  It can be difficult and feel unfair, but we always have the choice to do what we want to do with what it offers us.

That’s why this partnership with Spirit is so important.  Not every situation is something we can clearly accept or reject.  When it’s unclear what to do, can you trust yourself?  Can you trust your process?  Can you trust Spirit?  You feel you are a victim only when you don’t accept responsibility for your choices.  When you accept that responsibility, you are empowered and trustworthy and following a more conscious dance.

How have you trusted yourself lately in a difficult situation?  Please comment.

©2012 Georganne Spruce

Related Articles:  Trust and Acceptance of Yourself and Your Power, Trusting the Tao, How to Learn to Trust Yourself, Have Faith? Try Trust

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AWAKENING TO LOVE OURSELVES

Posted on January 18, 2012 | 5 comments

“You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection.”   Buddha

Do you love yourself?  Do you accept your failings and forgive yourself when you don’t live up to the standards you set?  Do you accept who you really are, including your limitations?

Struggling With Not Knowing

I’ll admit it.  I’ve been pretty judgmental about myself lately.  I set higher standards for myself than I do for others and am disappointed when I don’t live up to my expectations.  Lately, as I’ve mentioned before, I’ve been learning about social media and online marketing.  Now, after ten years writing my spiritual memoir, I have decided to e-publish it.  In addition, I’ve set up a blog and learned to navigate that technology.  This has been exhilarating and exhausting because computer technology is a huge challenge for me.

Sometimes I feel overwhelmed.  Everyday, it seems there are ten new questions I can’t answer.  Even when more savvy people answer my questions, I don’t always understand the answers.  Because of this, my greatest challenge is how inadequate I feel on a daily basis. Even after researching information on the internet, I often have to ask the same question again.

Understanding the Fear Beneath Our Inadequacy

When we feel stressed and inadequate, it is worthwhile to ask, “What is really causing this discomfort.   Frequently, it’s fear.  We are afraid we won’t succeed at this challenge. We’re afraid we won’t do it well enough, or we’re afraid we will disappoint others. When what we are doing becomes too difficult, we may give up and run away. Eliminating this source of discomfort seems like a simple solution.  But is it?

Refusing to face the challenge and solve the problem rarely gives us any lasting satisfaction.  What we really want is not to escape, but to feel capable of solving the problem or to feel all right about not knowing how. At these times, more than any other, we need to remember to accept and love ourselves.

Taking the Time to Love Ourselves

When we feel loved, we feel more capable.  We can do anything.  So perhaps, in these moments of doubt, what we most need to do is love ourselves.  What does that look like?  For me, I think it means accepting my difficulty understanding technology and telling myself it’s all right.  It means letting go of my ego’s need to handle all the challenges by myself.  It means congratulating myself each time I have the self-confidence to admit I don’t know what to do next and am willing ask for help.

We are each precious spiritual beings.  We must accept and love who we are in order to feel peaceful. If we feel inadequate or are self-judging, we need to raise our vibration. One way to do that is to turn inward, quiet ourselves, and release our fears and expectations. Then we may be able to hear that voice within that is so much wiser than ego. Breathing deeply, and with each breath, directing our minds to release the fear, we create a space where peace and new solutions can come through to us.

Doing what we enjoy, such as walking in the forest or by the seashore, eating a really nice meal, visiting with a good friend, or dancing, will also raise our vibration.  Taking our attention away from the fear and stress clears the mind.  Doing the things we enjoy nurtures us at the soul level and is a way of loving ourselves.  If we tend to take better care of others than ourselves, we need to do for ourselves what we do for others.

In the end, we need to accept we are fine the way we are.  Life will continue to offer opportunities to grow and become more of who we are.  When we stop feeling bad about our lack, we will be able to see the good we have done and the courage it took to do it.

What do you like most about yourself and what you’ve learned or done recently?  What lifts your vibration?

Please comment.  If there are topics you would like for me to discuss, please let me know by leaving a comment.  I’d love to respond to your interests.

© 2012 Georganne Spruce

Related Articles: Forgive Yourself-Powerful Self-Help, Accepting Oneself (A Buddhist view), Forgive Yourself (Wayne Dyer)

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AWAKENING THROUGH SPIRITUAL REFLECTION: WHAT DO YOU MIRROR?

Posted on August 24, 2011 | 4 comments

“Do you ever wonder if the guy in the puddle is real, and if you’re just a reflection of him?” Calvin and Hobbs

Seeing Who We Really Are

Do you ever find yourself observing someone’s behavior, being irritated by it, then suddenly realize the reason it irritates you is because it’s a reflection of your behavior?  The idea that we are mirrors for each other is a powerful one, but whether or not we learn from these experiences depends on what we are willing to see.

Sometimes reflections are so clear, exact replicas of our faces, words or behavior that we cannot miss the message.  Other times, like the picture above, the reflection seems cloudy with undefined edges and unclear images.

Sharing Our Awakening

Last night, I listened to a presentation on Human Design with several people, many of whom are friends.  We discovered that most of us belonged to the same design type.  As the characteristics of our type were revealed, we mirrored one another with startled stares, exclamations, and laughter, amazed by our similarities. We were told that the strategy for centering our energy was “to wait and respond.”  To use our will power to force things to happen would create frustration.  Considering the fact that several of us are self-employed, we also mirrored our shock at this revelation.  How could that be?

Awakening Through Reflection

As I attempted to integrate our similarities, I also became aware that some of my companions, in the past, have reflected my behavior in ways I don’t particularly like.  I was looking at both sides of the mirror at one time.  Flashes of memories came flooding back:  the times I wanted to control something that was uncontrollable, the times I responded insensitively to another because I was frustrated (ouch), the times when I held back information for fear I would reveal too much of myself, and most of all, the ways I criticized the person mirroring this to me.  Each person in that room was my teacher.

Reflecting Who We Really Are

Along with getting a glimpse of the way others mirror who I am, I became aware that the strategy for my design type, wait and respond, was basically the same as the major spiritual lesson I had been learning.  About a year ago, unhappy with the direction of my life, I meditated on how to create a less stressful life where I could put my writing at the center.  I felt I needed a master plan.  Then, the awareness came to me that all I needed to do was to take the first step.

Wait and Respond

I was tired.  Tired of trying so hard.  Tired of planning.  I decided to try a different way.  So I took the first step.  I began writing my memoir every day, decided to set up a blog and learn to use social media for marketing.  Okay, I did have sort of a plan, but what should I do first other than work on the memoir?

I waited.  Before long, what I needed showed up.  The community college offered courses on social media and blogging, and a woman I knew understood this new technology.  I took the courses and my friend became my mentor.  Waiting, something I hate to do, led me to the next step; then I responded.  The human design strategy simply reflected back to me what I already knew: when I wait, what I need shows up, then I respond.

I have much to reflect upon as I look deeper into the experience I had last night.  Some of edges in these reflections are crystal clear, while others are blurred and mysterious.  The latter will require that I go deeper.  In next week’s blog, I will explore the way we may use reflection to do that.

When you look at those close to you, what do they reflect back to you?  What are you willing to see?

ZQT4PQ5ZN7F5

© 2011 Georganne Spruce

Related Articles:

I See You, Now See Me – Neale Donald Walsh

How God Tells You It’s Time To Change – Wayne Dyer

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PRACTICING THE SPIRITUAL DANCE – DEVELOPING STRENGTH

Posted on July 6, 2011 | 3 comments

“We learn by practice.  Whether it means to learn to dance by practicing dancing or to learn to live by practicing living, the principles are the same.  One becomes in some area an athlete of God.”  Martha Graham

Dance As A Physical And Spiritual Practice

The practice of dance is one of the most rigorous and spiritual disciplines that exists.  Like all practices, the more one learns, the more expansive are the results.  Each step along the way yields riches of the physical and spiritual kind that not only strengthen one’s dance skills, but which enhance all aspects of life.  Beginning with this post, I want to use the practice of dance as an analogy to the practices that can enhance our lives spiritually.

From 1960 to the mid-1980’s, I trained, performed for four years, and taught modern dance.  Its gifts were abundant!  Dance taught me about inner and outer strength, how to balance and center my body and mind, and the value of flexibility.  Learning the value of daily dance practice and seeing that it could result in my accomplishing something I thought I couldn’t do taught me why it is so important not to give up when life becomes difficult.

Learning modern dance was enormously challenging for me.  As a child, stricken by rheumatic fever and a heart murmur at four years of age, I was not allowed normal physical exercise, nor was I able to study ballet, which was my dream.  Fortunately, I out grew the heart murmur and at sixteen, my high school offered a modern dance class which I quickly embraced.  It was tough for a weakling like me, but with time I developed muscles that gave me strength and some shape to my skinny body. This was the time of Marilyn Monroe and years before Twiggy’s shape became the ideal.

Choosing Physical and Spiritual Health

Without physical strength, we cannot enjoy the activity of life, but we also need inner strength.  A few years ago when I fell on the ice and sustained a broken elbow and two pelvic fractures, I went through months of physical therapy determined to return to my former state of activity.  What I found shocking was that, according to my physical therapist, most people stop doing their exercises as soon as they leave the rehab facility.  As a result, they never fully recover, choosing to remain disabled rather than be disciplined and committed to their healing.

Empowering Ourselves

With any injury or challenge, we need the inner strength to persevere and take responsibility for doing all we can do to overcome the challenge.  This is how we grow in confidence.  What dance taught me was that even when a new dance phrase was difficult and I struggled to perform it smoothly, if I kept going, it would eventually get easier, and one day it would flow effortlessly.  There is always some challenge in learning something new.  If we avoid everything that is difficult in life, we miss wonderful opportunities that, through our perseverance, will empower us. We all feel more confident when we have successfully overcome a daunting obstacle. 

Both inner and outer strength require practice in life as in dance.  By practicing, we develop experience, find new ways to solve problems, feel more confident, and grow in awareness.  We can’t learn to dance without dancing.  When we choose to develop strength, we are choosing to become an “athlete of God.”

 When have you been an “athlete of God” lately?  How do you practice?

 In 1960 Martha Graham, choreographed a dance called “Acrobats of God” in which she celebrated and made fun of dancers and choreographers.   Look here if you’d like to see a video.   

 © 2011 Georganne Spruce

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BODY AND SOUL AS ONE

Posted on June 2, 2011 | 1 comment

The Body As Container For The Soul

One of the problems I’ve often had with traditional religion is the way it describes the body as a lesser part of our being.  The body is, after all, the container for our soul.  If we didn’t need it in some cosmic sense, we wouldn’t have it.  At this stage in our spiritual journey, we are experiencing a physical life because we need to learn lessons we can only learn by being in a physical body.

If we embrace the idea of wholeness or oneness, then we have to acknowledge that all parts of ourselves are sacred.  Living in a body offers us infinite opportunities to learn.  As a child, I had many illnesses including one that left me with a heart murmur which I out grew by the time I was twelve.  I missed those early carefree years of life that others remember with joy.  What I remember is lying in bed alone reading and designing paper doll dresses, feeling weak and shy and inadequate when we played softball at school and never learning to ride a bicycle.  I remember having a friend or two but never feeling part of a group because so many group activities were too strenuous.

 Awakening The Body And Soul

As a result of this childhood experience, I developed two interests: good health and creativity which I later developed through dance and writing.  Staying healthy became a priority in my life.  As a young adult I began to search for the answers that would allow me to become stronger and stay in good health.  My love of dance was not just about expressing myself creatively.  It was about building muscles on my skinny frame to become strong.  It was also about the mind/body connection.  Having rejected traditional religion by this time, I found that dancing brought me joy and touched my spirit.  At times, dancing was transcendent, my body seemed to fall away and I was all spirit.

Each physical challenge has been a teacher.  Around 1976, I studied with an amazing dancer, Erick Hawkins during a summer dance program at American University.  Having studied Eastern philosophy and anatomy and kinesiology, he had created a modern dance technique that trained the body gently, working with the pelvis as the center of the body, and teaching us to respect our own bodies.

But that summer, I was in distress, and despite Hawkins’ peaceful way, I made a decision I would regret.  I injured one foot simply walking across campus, adding more pain to the tendinitis slowly healing in the other foot.  I was in a dance company and had a performance coming up.  We were short on dancers; I couldn’t disappoint the director.  So, I demanded that my doctor give me cortisone shots which he did going against his own better judgment.

When I danced, my feet were numb; I couldn’t feel the floor, but somehow I got through the performance.  Afterwards, as I rested and healed over several weeks, I realized I had committed a terrible act of aggression against myself.  I’d somehow crossed a line I’d never crossed before and was willing to abuse myself in order not to disappoint others. This was clearly a signal that something was very wrong with my thinking.  I realized at that moment that I couldn’t stop thinking about the reverence with which Hawkins treated the body even in training.  As I thought about Hawkins and the reverence he had taught us to have for our own bodies, I realized he had been my spiritual teacher that summer.

 Loving Ourselves With Good Health

This experience made me realize that I needed to learn to love myself.  I had created unnecessary suffering and my soul ached. Dance taught me about one aspect of taking care of my body, but other experiences taught me about a healthy diet.  When I had Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, I found a doctor of integrated medicine who taught me how to use food and supplements to heal. What I learned from him has continued to serve me well over the years to support my immune system, keep my blood sugar level, and sustain a level of energy that creates a feeling of well-being.

It is difficult to enjoy life when we don’t feel well, and while it is important to take care of our minds and soul, taking care of the body is sacred work too.  To deny the body’s needs is just as detrimental to our well-being as ignoring our spiritual or emotional needs.  Although I am middle aged, I’m actually healthier than I’ve ever been, and I believe that is because, in addition to taking care of my spiritual life, I have cared for my body, this precious container for my precious soul.

 Do you want life to be a dance or a drag?

We have a choice and it’s an important one.  Caring for our bodies makes it possible to do things that feed the soul like walking in the forest, dancing until dawn or jogging through the early morning air with your daughter.  What are you willing to do to make your body and soul one?

© 2011 Georganne Spruce

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HAVING FAITH

Posted on May 25, 2011 | 1 comment

Clearing the Heart Blocks

 Several summers ago, I attended a retreat in the beautiful mountains of North Carolina taught by Vani(Linda Bretherton), a healer from the United Kingdom.  The setting couldn’t have been more inspiring with ponds and streams, a butterfly garden, and a quaint rustic lodge.  The year before, Vani had worked on my charkas, opening many blocks that enabled me to find the courage to pursue a more heartfelt life.  In a small pavilion by a rushing stream, we did deep, difficult work, and when I left I knew it would take a while to integrate what I had experienced.

For the next year, my life was rather stressful, but also joyous, because there were times when I was joyfully immersed in writing, stopped worrying about how to make a living and just celebrated being alive. Only when the sense of lack from my early conditioning came back to haunt me did I feel stressed.

Spiritual Messages

This conflict between my emotional and practical sides had always been a challenge.  One night just before the retreat, I had a dream in which I was at the Intuition Institute.  Referring to my lack of clarity concerning the path I should follow, I asked, “What’s this all about?”  The answer was “It’s a struggle between the rational and the intuitive.”

Then, almost a month after the retreat, I woke suddenly at 3:30 am like a bolt of lightning had hit me.  Totally lucid and feeling surprisingly peaceful, I saw a large billboard in my mind.  Across it in neon letters, Spirit wrote, “It’s all in place. Relax.”  That was simply too much for me to process, so I turned over and went back to sleep.

By the time I woke again, I could only respond to this message with awe.  It didn’t seem quite real.  However, the theatre teacher in me was very impressed with how dramatically effective Spirit had been in getting my attention.  She was usually more subtle than this, but evidently I hadn’t been listening very closely or my fears were clouding my mind.  Clearly, she didn’t want me to miss this one.

The Fear of Letting Go

After I exhausted myself analyzing the meaning of this remarkable experience, I realized I was avoiding accepting this simple and beautiful message. Underneath it all, I didn’t trust myself enough to believe I deserved Spirit’s trust.  What if I were unable to truly accept this? And what if I could accept this?  That was a scary thought: really turn my life over to Spirit, to do it completely this time.  To really let go.  To have complete faith.

 I have a little poster on Faith that says,

When you have come to the edge of all the light you know,

And are about to step off into the darkness of the unknown,

Faith is knowing one of two things will happen:

There will be something to stand on

Or you will be taught how to fly

 I remembered all the tears I had shed at the retreat.  They came in enormous waves as if the ocean were crashing through my soul.  They were uncontrollable, washing away large quantities of deep sadness, ancient wounds, carrying me through deep currents to eventually deposit me in the light again where I knew I was a Divine Being.  I had underestimated the power of those tears to force me to let go. 

What more could I want to know than “It’s all in place. Relax!”

And yet, there I was a week later – angry, resistant, confused, stressed, clutching, attached to one point of view – unwilling to shift my thinking to a new perspective.  Even after releasing my fears and reaffirming that I was open to Spirit’s guidance, I fell back into the quagmire of negativity and attachment.  Where was my trust, my faith, my knowing?

At a ceremony on the night before the October full moon, I chose an Insight card, “Prosperity.”  I asked, “How?”  The answer was “It’s coming.”  For clarification, I drew another card that stated, “Take time off to allow your body to rest and renew.”

“It’s all in place. Relax!”

So, I rested.  On the full moon, something shifted.  I let go of my need to control the situations in my life.  I accepted the possibility that looking at the cause of my anger from a different perspective would allow me to understand these situations in a deeper and more beneficial way. I considered the possibility that I truly did deserve Spirit’s full support, that I did deserve this gift, that all I wanted was already in place waiting for me to claim it.

Five years after Vani’s retreat and Spirit’s amazing message, I have continued to receive financial and emotional support for my writing from many unexpected sources.  I have learned to trust that I may not know the outcome of the whole plan, but I simply take the next step.  I don’t need to know what the step after that really is, for Spirit keeps surprising me with where she wants me to go.  I’m learning there is not one answer; there are many answers.  I have to remind myself frequently to let go, relax, and make space for the miraculous to bless my life.

Faith is, after all, the ultimate acceptance that the unknown is Good.  “Relax!  It’s all in place.”       © 2011 Georganne Spruce

Check The Vortex on the side bar for more information on The Law of Attraction.

 

 

 

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BEING THE RIGHT ONE

Posted on April 14, 2011 | 4 comments

“As we grow in consciousness, we discover it is more important to be the right person than to find the right person.” Ken Keyes, Jr.

How many times have you said, “If only I had the right___.”  We can fill in the blank with any of the following:  the right partner, the right dress, the right friend, the right job, the right house or the right degree.  Actually the list is endless.  What we are really saying is that we believe something outside of us is magical enough to fix what is not right within us.  If we are not at peace with the interior, the exterior will never be acceptable.

When I found the house where I now live, I chose it for many reasons.  It has beautiful hardwood floors, it’s one level, it has lots of trees around it, and it’s in a quiet neighborhood.  But the main reason I chose it was that when I walked in the front door, it felt like my center.  The energy felt like my peaceful energy when I’m meditating.  A feeling of happiness and thankfulness filled my heart.  The energy of the house’s interior matched the energy of my interior at its best.  I wanted a house where I could come home from the trials of the world and find life there – a place of healing, regeneration, and celebration that matched the best part of me.

Too often we focus on what is out there, and time after time we are disappointed.  Husbands, parents, bosses, friends just don’t live up to our expectations.  The problem isn’t with others; the problem is within.  When we are the right persons, we fill up our own emptiness.  We find the courage to make the decisions that will make us happy. 

One time when I lived in New Mexico, I was complaining about everything that was going wrong in my life.  I said to a friend, “If I could just put together the life I want, I would be happy.”  Without missing a beat, she smiled and said, “When you’re happy, Georganne, you’ll have the life you want.”  She was right of course.  When we generate that joy within, take responsibility for being the right person in our lives, our expanded consciousness becomes a magnet for all good things.  The people we meet and the experiences we have are matches for our joy within.

This week let’s make a list of all the things we can do daily to generate joy within ourselves.  Each time a wave of joy springs up inside, notice what you’re doing or thinking that has generated this.  Please share at least one thing under comments and I’ll use your ideas in my next few posts.  Blessings!

© 2011 Georganne Spruce

 

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